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TLDR: My mom tried something new with my birthday cake and it didn't turn out great and I'm disappointed.

EDIT: I would've made my own cake and have in the past but I have been traveling for work. I don't live at home, I came home for the day because my mom wanted to celebrate. My mom has always made our cakes and loves doing it. I didn't expect her too… She offered and it's tradition.

I (25F) have had the same birthday cake since I was probably 6 or 7 years old, at least as long as I can remember. On years when I was away on my birthday my parents would have a birthday dinner and cake a couple days before/after and it was the same lemon cake my mom makes, using canned icing.

This year I came home a couple days after my birthday and my mom informed me that she made the icing for my cake from scratch this year because she wants us all to stop eating as many additives. She had me try the icing that she made and it was not very good – I've made the same icing before and every single attempt has failed because it gets this weird aftertaste. She asked me what I thought and I said it was pretty good for homemade icing but that in general lemon buttercream is tough to make from scratch, but it was pretty good. She then asked me if I liked it better than the canned lemon icing and I answered honestly no, not really but it was good. (It was not, but my mom is really sensitive about these things.) That comment was not met well and she kind of flippantly replied "Oh well it's on your cake, so you'll have to deal with it."

This was really disappointing to me because I have been traveling for work and was looking forward to coming home to my favorite cake. I get that she makes it and I'm grateful but I've had the same thing since I was little and I was really excited for it. I am very much a person who eats the same thing again and again, so when a few weeks ago she asked if I would want a different cake she wanted to try I politely declined it. I look forward to the same cake every year.

I asked her why she made the icing instead of the can and she told me about not wanting additives in our food anymore but also told me she wouldn't be eating the cake because of her diet. She has been on a sugar free diet (bar some things like fruit) and has become very diet and health conscious lately because she is trying to lose weight. I didn't make a stink about things because I'm still grateful and it's a stupid problem but I also was obviously a little sad about it.

She is clearly upset that I don't like it, I'm disappointed that I don't get the cake I was looking forward to, and now my dad is annoyed because in his words he "knew I would make this a problem since [I] am always so specific about things." He told me that I should've acted enthusiastic and like I liked it to make my mom happy because it wasn't about me.

I don't know, on the one hand this feels like champagne problems (after all, my mom did make me a cake) on the other it feels like my parents aren't actually interested in what I want and it's disappointing that I don't get to enjoy something I was looking forward to.

Should I have pretended it was amazing? Am I an asshole for being disappointed and honest about it?